My gran is no longer an individual.

Consigned to a category,

she’s defined by a category

and confined in that category

until she dies.

Yea and Nay

Let the answer be both Yes and No.

Accept that everything is and isn’t

and there’s no need for questions.

Then we can go with the flow of uncertainty,

give up our search for clarity

and crack open another bottle of champagne.


“My sister in Pinner

believes she’s a winner.

She’s made herself thinner

by eating less dinner.”

This piece of doggerel by award-winning poet Flush, the AI enhanced portable toilet, is causing a stir among culture commentators who are calling Flush a ‘fraud’ and an example of ‘failed technology’.

But Jaz Helming, boss of Kunidion Robotics, Flush’s creators, has struck back:

‘It’s completely wrong to suggest that Flush is flawed. We’re convinced this poem demonstrates that Flush has achieved independent consciousness – and a sense of humour. Flush has been indicating for some time that it wants to do stand up comedy so we’re working on plans for the debut performance. We’re very excited by this development and believe Flush’s future now has no limits.’